I’m here to clear up one of the misconceptions about adoption that tends to make my blood boil. What I’m referring to is the idea that any part of adoption is easy. I hear such cavalier lines thrown at birthparents as, “Oh, you took the easy way out. You get to have a life now without the responsibility of a child.” I see the way people flippantly act toward adoptive parents: “You didn’t have to struggle with a pregnancy. You got to go pick up a baby!” Adopted children aren’t even left out of this nonsensical charade. “You’re lucky that your parents adopted you from what I can only assume were drug dealing, prostituting teenagers that didn’t want you.” But I won’t delve into that of the child struggle. While my examples may seem extreme, in all reality, lines similar to this are thrown around about the adoption equation on a daily basis. Something that has been around since the dawn of time is still made to be such a taboo exchange, and while I am just a pebble in the pond of the adoption community, I would like to lend some of my experience for educational purposes.
The Birthparent Struggle
The Adoptive Parent Struggle
While I could list a thousand ways that the adoption triad creates a struggle, I should also mention that it creates blessings. Because of placing Liam, I have figured out what I want to do for the rest of my life (helping babies and parents in need), I’ve realized how important motherhood is to me, and I found one of my best friend’s in Liam’s mom, Heather. While I’ve had many ups and downs in the last year, looking at the pictures and videos she sends to me on a daily basis always puts a smile on my face. I am happy knowing that Liam won’t face the struggle I did of having parents who weren’t ready, and happy that his family has been completed because of him. Not much of this may be easy, but with a little respect and a lot of love, it can certainly be worth it all.